I am really in a shitty mood from last couple of days. Don’t know why so don’t bother to ask, but I see am livid and irritated with any and every one around me. Ever heard and seen a fuming-angry dragon breath-fire or witnessed really big volcanic eruptions? Yep, you got it!
Needless to say, the guys in office are the blessed ones to get it in abundance but not only that, I am like infuriated with every damn thing around me. I don’t feel like talking to anyone. Don’t want to socialize (hah, when did I feel like that anyways?). Can’t tolerate movies, not that they make even half decent movies these days but there were times when I could even watch a Mithun Da flick. Have a confirmed booking for vacation in Sikkim during Christmas, but feel like cancelling it every now and then. As obvious, I don’t feel like writing anymore and no, its not that bloody writer’s block coz I have hell of pointless stuff to blah blah about and then I don’t really think of myself as a writer, let alone their blocks.
Work used to be something where I never ever had any problems. Come what may, but business and office always kept me absorbed and devoted, but looking again, its no more fun these days. This is more of an obligation than passion. You know what, sometimes I feel like leaving everything aside and running far away. I think with my experience and qualification, whatever I have, I would get a job for waiter or probably a cab driver somewhere in a remote and peaceful place like may be Diu. See, what is the bloody point of working 14 hours a day? When you reach back to home in night, you are eating those 2 cold chapattis all alone. Now please spare the comments section and don’t start the gyan that probably I need to relook and try to balance out the things coz no, I can’t bloody do that. You know, Business is like a mouse trap. Once you are in, you are trapped. You cannot pull back coz once you start bossing around you cannot get your ass into a job where someone else is bossing you. You cannot stand still with costs rising everyday and competition ready to eat you up. All you can do is keep moving ahead somehow and that is the only way to survive. Ever seen a cricket in spider web or someone in marsh? More you try to come out, all the more trapped you are. That is business for you darling.
Of course there are perks but is it really worth? Its peace that we need in life, not a rollercoaster ride of stress every day. Happiness, which cannot come with the materialistic things in life. A few days back, I asked dad, let us buy a new TV, may be a 42” LCD or something and though he said yes but asked just one question. In last two months how many hours I have actually spent watching TV. I think it won’t come up to 24 hours in total but guess we try to distract ourselves with such things and try to find happiness in places where we are most unlikely to find it.
It ain’t any use writing pages on how I am feeling and am sure no one cares anyways but hell, its my place after all.
Finally, a little Trivia – As it shows “Bloody” is my favorite word these days, exceeding the uses by 99 times a day and 2 times in a sentence.
Cheers!
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hmm.. i can really relate to your state of mind coz that happens with me quite often.. but dude u need to get over t and ofcourse enjoy your vacation in Sikkim. Cmon ts a beautiful place!! :)
As I read the title I almost thought you were addressing my attention ;p
Go take that break! Don't know for sure but maybe it should help - if you can, try and go to Yumthang and look for my footprint...lol!
Take care, ST.
can some oee else go to sikkim in ur name?? :P
see i hav a better soltn. giv the managers seat to me, i assure u tht ter wudn be a seat to botr u in 2 months time [i doubt if it wud take even 2 months] :P
y dnt u read news papers? it shud give u a daily dos of laughter.
This is as frustrated as I was pre my mini vacation. I almost resigned! (I did and they asked me to reconsider when I had cooled down).
Like Sparkling, I'd say, take a break. The Sikkim trip will do u good. A few days of doing nothing.
I identify with everything you said here, so no gyan. Been there done that. Take care :-)
Sur - Hmmm
Sparkling - Thanks for the laugh.. for a change I was not addressing you :)
BTW, what are you? Yeti? Dont think otherwise I can distinguish your footprints :)
Sawan - all yours... come and take the charge for your new job.. I just need 50k as monthly remuneration and every thing else is yours.. I am telling you its not a bad deal at all...
Ms. Saints - you tried to resign? have you forgotten the pre this new job era?
hope you''ve cheered up by now and that things are looking up. :-)