Though I, in fact all of us, love to imagine ourselves as very organized, hardworking and no time waster kind of persons but no matter what, there are times when we really feel like doing nothing. You know when the brain cells (or germs) are so stressed or lethargic or just too apathetic that they start dancing on a threatening tune. Now the problem is, we can do that for a while (in my case, the record is half an hour) but after that we can not really sit idle. The mind wants to be idle but rest of the body does not actually want to cooperate.
To deal with such critical situation, it was required to derive some really neat and innovative techniques (at times, I also imagine myself as a very good planner, thanks to the company of my brother), so after carefully working on several hypothetical notions, I have come up with this sophisticated white paper (sounds classy?) on killing time. All of these techniques are proven and tested (courtesy me and my brother), however, you are suggested to try them on your own risk and make sure you have read the last section (Side Effects) of this post. So here it goes… have a happy time killing session :)
1) Chat with a Tele Caller while making him/her believe that you are really interested in product and in between bring up dumb questions like “so you mean I will be able to withdraw cash from my credit card with any ATM” or may be “oh really!! So you will also be delivering hardcopy of a statement apart from e-bill, you know I am really bad with this computer thingy”. The key here is to keep your expressions and tone full of innocence and/or enthusiasm.
2) Play an imaginary instrument with your lips and fingers, making ablub, bub, blub noises.
3) If you have the luxury of a couch or sofa in your cabin, you can sit there while specs adjusted on an angle when your eyes are not easily visible, keep an open book or magazine or office document in your lap and take a quick (depends on how much time you have or how far can you go without being caught) nap
4) If your laptop or desktop has a webcam, switch that on, check out your face for best expressions (for meetings when you try to look serious, for dating when you try to look intelligent and witty at same time, when smiling and so on) you can also try different sitting positions like legs crossed, different positions of your hands on your face and so on.
5) If you are in office or a place which is suitably crowded. Try to look around and start staring people. In offices, this has been proved as a very efficient trick coz most of the people around will think as if you are so occupied and involved in a thought process. Some of them might try to stare back at you but don’t loose momentum and keep on staring and they will break it in no time... For better effects, make a pile of papers on your desk, keep several windows opened on your desktop and while staring, try to play with a pen or pencil in your fingers or mouth…
6) Close your eyes and try to feel the things around, imagine how it would be for blinds and how good is your sensing abilities (with touches). This one has a positive side as well, when working in dark or really difficult corners where you can’t actually see the things, you can rely on your fingers. It proved very helpful in my previous office when trying to plug in cables in my computer which was located in a place, only an interior decorator/architect can think of.
7) If you are in home.. try to relax on bed, roll over, crack your ankles while making strange noises like ohhoo.. ho ho ho.. ahh god.. and please, don’t start racing your minds in the dirty directions. I didn’t have had any such intentions. If its night, try to stare at sky and draw imaginary shapes from clouds and/or stars. There is a fair chance that you will see a falling star (if you believe in that theory) or if you are luckier then probably a UFO hidden some where in clouds and aliens starting at you (come on they might also feel the urge to do nothing)
8) Write an email to president or PM office or even your MD while stating problems and of course solutions to the poor state of facilities, employment issues, your PF a/c statement mismatch, salary policies or an damn thing under this sky. Make sure that you DON’T post it otherwise you won’t even need to read the side effects section of this post.
9) Invite your friend on a messenger with whiteboard access for a Tic Tac Toe game. Skype and Yahoo has got pretty good add-ons for the same. (Tried and proven approach you see ;)
10) Read this blog, post comments, refresh on every 5 minutes to check updates, repeat step 1
Side effects/Warnings
1) If you boss is also reading this page, there are fairly good chances of your getting fired.
2) If your wifey or GF knows that you have this much time to kill, you are very likely candidate to accompany her on next shopping spree.
3) You might start finding these activities so interesting that you will intentionally try to find time to waste.
So guys, I seriously hope this post has successfully wasted 5-7 minutes of your time and probably suggested few more ways to cleverly invest rest of the same. Feel free to add more ways oh sorry techniques and keep posting in comments!!
Cheers !!
P.S. – only tried and proven techniques will be accepted here ;)
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Thats wot i'm doing now!Posting Comments :D
@ scattered thoughts...good one...
:D
No.6 sounds very very interesting but I'm totally thinking s'thing else :D
Hey, you forgot the most important point; reading BLOGS! What do you think I do most of the time? Including yours of course :)
scrawler - yeah.. and you said time is such a luxury these days..
sen - so how many of these have you already tried or planning to try.. honestly haan.. :)
still - actually I tried to keep it generalized.. not for the blog maniacs like us.. we don't have any time to waste.. do we ???
@scattered thoughts...I didn't say 'time is a luxury theses days"..i just quoted sawan's words!!
scrawler - oh yeah.. I agree :)
aha. i have so many options to choose from!!
"Write an email to president or PM office or even your MD while stating problems and of course solutions to the poor state of facilities, employment issues, your PF a/c statement mismatch, salary policies or an damn thing under this sky. "
Sen actually wrote a letter.. man, m telling you, you got serious followers :-)
how could u forget one of the most important of them all : talking to Mr X for hours and listening how his whole day has been, how many times he fought with his galfrnd....or I suppose u have kept a time-slot for that in ur busy schedule.
sawan - no comments dude... sen has already threatened for targeting me in her next post... so playing safe :)
tina - this is a generalized guide you see :) and you won't believe what I did to Mr. X yesterday. I was speaking to him when he was bullshitting about every damn thing and how he is not planning to go to his fiancé's birthday and so on. I connected a call to her on the other phone and turned the speaker on.. obviously the poor chap didn't know so he kept on digging his own grave ;) you can imagine what must have happened to him when he spoke to her later.. the kid is screwed... may his soul rest in peace :))
gosh! u have back stabbed ur dear friend and I m sure he is never going to forgive u for this.
he he he.. some how I couldn't help it..
for others, who don't know Mr. X - he is a very good friend of mine and we kind of speak a lot on phone.. and as you can see he has got a fiancé so its safe to assume that we are straight.. dont get carried away guys ;)
totally cool :P
@ scattered thoughts...sorry for the delayed response...my internet connection had some probs...heheh...yeah I loved the ones about writing to the PM, actually did it, will try the webcam on too, though the office one is a bit too risky, you see I have a reputation for being a unapproachable ice-queen, I just cant stare at the commoners in the office :)
athi - :))
sen - I can imagine... the queen can't just look at COMMONERS like that ;) too much haan..
@ scrawler... absolutely, reputation bhi koi cheez hoti hai na ...:))
hahhahahhaha, what a white paper!!!
the telecaller thing is actually being practised literally every day by a colleague of mine...thats the only reason/excuse to have so many kinda cards on him:)
so does ur bro blog? considering this white paper, i guess he is qualified to join the gang:):)
btw, when i read 'germs' for 'brain cells' i felt u r talking my lingo:):)
vin - my bro is too lazy to even read the blogs, let alone writing..
You can say, he truly believes in doing nothing whenever he can :))
Hi ...nice post...liked points 4,5and 6 very much...